When something is on someone's mind, when they spend a lot of time thinking about something, maybe obsessing, they tend to talk about it... A lot.
This can get annoying at the best of times, but none of us are immune to it, so most people politely listen, at least for a while.
The real problem comes when someone is talking so much about something that they consider a good thing that it seems like they are gloating. Even if it does not seem like that, others who are not as fortunate can sometimes start to feel bad listening to said gloater. Usually, unless the person talking is a jerk, nothing bad is meant by it. They want to discuss this event because they are happy and want to share. Maybe they want to bounce ideas off of their friends. Maybe they just don't have anything else to talk about because they are obsessing about the subject. They fact that they have no intent to make others unhappy (usually just the opposite) does not help make their audience feel better. The speaker just seems like a jerk.
Well, I guess I am that jerk. I talk about my upcoming retirement to the exclusion of almost all other subjects. I am happy about it, and a little afraid. I want to share, get input from others, bounce my ideas off of others.
I was asked to "Not Rub it In" the other day. That is when I realized that those that are not looking at an upcoming retirement really don't want to hear about my fortunate situation. I was being a Jerk. Not intentionally of course, but that is how it comes across to others. I have to work on this, and talk less often about this.
I guess my upcoming retirement is not something that I see as just being lucky, as some people have said it. I planned on it. I cannot say that any of the following commentary accurately represents what I was thinking at the time, but it gives an idea why I am in the position I am in, when some others who were more fortunate than I in many ways are not in a position to retire.
When I first entered the working world, I looked at how people spent their money, and lived their lives. So many people were buying new cars, big houses, fancy watches, electronics, new cloths, the works. I was not making much money at the time, but it did not make much sense to me to spend so much on most of those things. The only exception was motorcycles. I bought new Harley's and rode the crap out of them. Even then, I would buy the least expensive model that did what I needed, and modify it only enough to make it more functional then ride it until it was not worth much of anything. Others would spend twice as much as I did for purchasing and modifying their bikes. And they would ride the bikes a tenth as much as I did. I only had one Harley that had less than 100,000 miles on it when I got rid of it. That was a bike with over 70,000 miles on it, that was at the dealership for a goodwill warranty repair. I got a great deal on a trade in, since the engine was going to be pretty much rebuilt by the factory, and the dealership had a brand new set of sheet metal to put on it from some customers bike that was modified. It cost them nothing to put on a new tank, fenders etc and have a bike that looked brand new. It did not hurt that the speedometer had been replaced at one point and it looked like the bike only had about 14,000 miles on it.
Anyway, I was frugal. I tended to look at my options and choose the one that was most cost effective. I spent plenty of money on travel, but I did it in a way that gave me a lot of bang for my buck. I chose living arrangements that really helped me out financially. While others were buying houses and fancy trucks, I was investing in my retirement fund and driving shitbox cars. As others got raises, they increased their spending. I increased my savings.
Yes I was lucky. My parents sent me to school. I did poorly, but well enough to graduate with a meaningful degree. I was also fortunate enough to have older coworkers that gave me good advice. I was also lucky that I followed it, as I could have easily listened to some of the bad advice I was given. I was entering the workforce at the time that 401k programs were just starting and made good use of those.
Some of my "luck" consisted of making decisions that turned out to be good. I did not know I was doing the right thing at the time, but fortunately I did the right thing. Or maybe A right thing, as there is seldom just one right choice. One's life tends to be a series of decisions you make before you know what decisions to make. I lucked into a good job. I cannot say I really liked the job, but it was not all that bad either. I chose to stay in this job for 32 years. I could have gone into other jobs where I would have made more money, or into jobs that I liked more, but I got this one, and stayed there. For 32 years I planned my retirement, and now I am there. Well, soon.
So, am I gloating? No. I am scared shitless, like the Zoo animal when the cage door is left open I am afraid to leave. But leave I will. So if I am talking too much about it, have some pity for me, entering a world of the unknown. Then tell me to shut the heck up! No one wants to hear it.